Tag Archives: Culture

Little Lady, I See You

13 Oct

“Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.” 1 Timothy 4:12 (KJV)

The perception of purity grieves me for a number of reasons, not only for the scriptural reasons, but for the women, young and old, caught up in the belief that they must adhere to an immoral cultural standard to be accepted and loved.

The problem really exploded in the 60’s with the Vietnam War. The youth believed that someone was going to drop “the bomb” and we were all going to die. I had friends who vowed never to marry or have children because we were “all going to die soon.” The Haight-Ashbury Park was constantly on TV; free sex, drugs, rock ‘n’ roll; party and do what “feels good.” Thank goodness I didn’t get caught up in that culture.

I recognize that purity has been a problem since the beginning of time, if it hadn’t been it wouldn’t have been mentioned in the Bible. However, I suspect that with today’s media, our young people are bombarded and confused about what is morally right and acceptable.

In the last 5 years I’ve found it nearly impossible to find reasonably priced clothing in a modest style. Low cut tops and high midriffs, with tight low-cut pants, sends a sexual message, intended or not, that the wearer is available. After clothing stimulation are the TV shows where it is normal to have sex after a casual meeting with music in the background playing “I want to sex you up.” No wonder people are confused.

The culture doesn’t just affect the secular world, the children raised in church face the same issues. We teach them good values and then they have to live in a world where they look so out of norm. Kids tell them they are freaks and if they have to dress that way they don’t want to be Christians. Our kids feel caught between 2 worlds and most gravitate toward their peers.

When a person does step out of the secular world and comes to church, giving their heart to Jesus, a new dilemma arises – condemnation! What was acceptable clothing and behavior outside the church is an offense inside the church and they are torn between the pain of the world and the condemnation of the church.

Before we can teach a person about honor, strength, wisdom, commitment to Christ, fruitful lives and Christ-like intimacy, we have to help them understand who they are in Christ and the preciousness God sees in them. Until they realize that they are accepted, they will not be willing to change their lifestyles.

If the women and men of the church could encourage them in some area of their life, then they will work harder in that encouraged area and the Holy Spirit will work inside of them. The church can’t expect overnight change, they didn’t get where they are in a day and they won’t get out in a day. The more we encourage and spend time with them, the more they will want to model our walk and leave worldly behaviors behind. It takes the older, spiritually mature women, to guide the younger women in the right path; same with the spiritually mature men and young men. Love and respect will be the catalyst for true and continued growth.

The key for the church is mentoring, consistency and love. Once modesty is understood, the other areas will fall into place. You can’t teach honor, wisdom, spiritual strength or a fruitful life, but you can model it. If church representatives dress seductively, the newcomers will become confused and leave. If leadership doesn’t set boundaries for worship teams and platform attire, how can we expect the congregation to be modest? People will follow the area of your life that they see honors Christ. They will want the peace and the joy you have and will see how you attain it. They will read stories in the Bible and see how change in people’s lives brought about a change in the world. They will want to make a difference too. We teach by our walk, our love, our encouragement, just like Jesus did with His disciples. That’s an okay thing; maybe that’s the PERFECT thing.

Father God, please always let me see the person inside, and not what is hanging on the outside. Let me see others with Your eyes.

Written 3-11-2010 / Published 10-13-2021

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HOPE

18 Jul

Hopeless child

“Now hope is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1

I knew what I wanted to be from the age of 3.  Every year it changed, sometimes every month.  I had big elaborate dreams and overwhelming visions.  Some came to pass, some I let go with maturity – but I would never have been able to accomplish anything in life if I hadn’t had those dreams built on hope.

I worked in an inner-city school and had gathered a small group of children together for a state standards test.  These were the students that had been absent on the regular testing day and had to make-up the test.  One little boy, 3rd grade, 8-year-old, captured my heart.  This boy whizzed through the math, flew through the language, but when the time came for writing he sat, not moving, eyes firmly fixed on his paper.

The test allowed 45 minutes for this section.  After 30 minutes all of the other students were gone and he sat alone, staring.  When I reminded him of the time, tears began to well up in his eyes.  I asked if he had ideas of what he could write.  He shook his head “no.”  I suggested his favorite person, a hero – he didn’t have one.  What about what he wanted to be when he grew up – he didn’t know.

President?  “No.”

Astronaut?  “No.”

Movie Star?  “No.”

Sports Star?  “No.”

I suggested he write about fun times with his Mom – he did not have a memory of a fun time with his Mom. Special times spent with his Dad – he never had a special time with his Dad.  Fun or silly things he did with his pets – didn’t have a pet, never did.  A sports game he’d gone to – never been to one.  A vacation – never been on one.

With each suggestion his shoulders stooped a little farther until he almost lay on his paper.  A moment later he began to sob.  I tried to comfort him, letting him know that it was only a test and that there were no right or wrong essays, it was just his thoughts he needed to write down – it didn’t help.  I finally told him to just write who he was and that he couldn’t think of anything to write – and I silently prayed that his sentence would be long enough for them to grade.

He handed me his paper and pencil and slowly left to go back to his regular classroom, wiping his eyes and composing himself as he went.  I felt as broken as he.  I was angry with the culture.  I was angry with the school.  I was angry with the parents.  I was angry with the whole system, a system that allows 8-year-old boys to “survive” day to day in a difficult inner-city world with no hope for tomorrow.  With a culture where two parents with a limited education struggle to make a home and feed a family, but have no time to nurture the hopes and dreams inside the children.

What has happened to our culture when our children have no hope for tomorrow?  Where, Jesus, do we start?  How, Lord do we begin to show the children the very love of God that builds the hope and dreams they deserve – when God isn’t allowed in the schools?  How, Jesus, do we place into an 8-year-old child a dream to be the President, an astronaut, to be a parent and raise a family – a desire to LIVE for tomorrow?

Lord Jesus, forgive us our sins of not seeing those, most precious in your sight, laying waste in a life of “getting by.”

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